Most of the year you try and monitor how many chocolates and sweets your children have. You’re worried about tooth decay, childhood obesity and the biggest one of all that they’ll not eat their tea.
But wait, what is this? Easter? Whooothere. Let’s just bribe them leading up to Easter Sunday ‘if you’re naughty you won’t get any chocolate from the Easter Bunny’, then when the big day comes it’s a whole new world of mixed messages and inconsistency.
The night before we create the equivalent of a shop window of chocolate decoration, fear we haven’t bought enough and go to bed dreaming of chocolate bunnies and wondering if we’ve got enough Cilit Bang for cleaning up the sofa.
The next morning kids wake up overjoyed that they can see mountains of chocolate. Then you make the mistake of agreeing to chocolate for breakfast. Kids unwrap eggs at warp speed and quite literally inhale milk chocolate goodness not really giving a hoot about the shape, size or construction of the egg.
Within minutes you decide to pull rank, telling your children to stop eating chocolate because they’ll be sick. You expect that you can take all the chocolate and sweeties away based on the idea that you’re saving them from themselves. Deluded. You are deluded.
Why give kids what they want, stop them halfway and then expect them to behave in order to get their swag back? Can you imagine what would happen if you were offered the adult equivalent?
‘Here are the keys to the pub, it’s yours for the day. It’s all free and no one else will pop in. You get a free and personalised bar for the day. ‘
One hour later.
‘We’re going to temporarily close the bar for a few hours. We’ll let you know when you can come back, but don’t hold your breath.’
Anarchy would ensue.
Adults and especially parents are weird. And as for the Easter Bunny.